This paper seeks to understand a subtle form of relational common sens
e among Japanese conversational partners. To do so we examine possible
explanations of a conversation between two Japanese that at first gla
nce appears atypical. We argue that the most satisfying explanation is
grounded in an understanding of the Japanese concept of kenson. Using
ethnographic techniques the ''common sense'' of kenson is detailed in
regards to its forms and meanings. Implications of this concept for c
onversation are discussed as well as comparisons made between kenson,
the American notion of modesty and Japanese indirect refusals. Finally
, kenson is discussed as an informal ritual grounded in social norms.