Cognition during marital conflict: The relationship of thought and talk

This article describes and analyzes the stream of thought occurring concurr ently with overt communication about marital conflict. The research conside rs how marital conflicts may be affected by selective attention to differen t elements of conflict (different emotions, issues, interactional behaviors , and background events) and by spontaneous attributions about communicativ e intentions and outcomes. One hundred eighteen couples discussed a current conflict issue, then individually watched a videotape of the discussion an d reported thoughts and feelings experienced during the discussion. Descrip tively, the thoughts revealed limited complexity, infrequent perspective ta king, a predominant concern for implicit relationship issues over content i ssues, and frequent direct analysis of the communication process. Spouses v iewed their own communication in more favorable terms than their partner's communication. Husbands and wives also viewed the interactions differently, with wives appearing, in certain respects, more other-directed, relationsh ip-sensitive, and objective. Interaction-based thoughts were especially sub jective in the most severe conflicts, as suggested by a lack of corresponde nce between attributions about communication and observer coding of the int eractions. Furthermore, in severe conflicts and dissatisfied relationships, the individuals had more angry, blaming, and pessimistic thoughts and less focus on content issues.